I had intended to blog about a conversation I had a few nights ago. I'd already written my post, but saved it in the wrong format for the Moroccan cybercafe computer to open. I'll leave you instead with a quote by Olga Broumas, from her poem "Circe."
What I wear in the morning pleases
me:green shirt, skirt of wine. I am wrapped
in myself as the smell of night
wraps round my sleep when I sleep
outside. By the time
I get to the corner
bar, corner store, corner construction
site, I become divine. I turn
men into swine. Leave
them behind me whistling, grunting, wild.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Saturday, August 9, 2008
A late night talk about a lot of things (Retroactive Post)
Last night, we had a discussion. Me, my fellow American expat tour leader, her Moroccan boyfriend, and all his brothers talked about life, the universe, and everything.
Or rather, we talked about a lot of semirelated things including women in Islam and in Morocco, Islam in general, Arab countries versus the US, capitalism, and so forth. And I’m honestly not sure how much communication actually took place.
It all started when my friend Autumn asked why women aren’t supposed to pray out loud in mosques like men. The answer that the boys gave was so that weak men wouldn’t hear women’s voices and be aroused by them. Frankly I found this explanation to be bullshit, as very few women have voices that are that inherently sexy. The same explanation was offered for why women have to keep covered and wear hijab (headscarfs). So that weak men won’t see them and be tempted. And the boys seemed to see no problem with this logic. But when Autumn asked why it was the women’s responsibility to protect men from their baser instincts, the merde hit the fan and resulted in a conversation that lasted until four o’clock in the morning.
The conversation was not in the least bit organized, with people getting defensive, jumping to conclusions, changing the topic, cutting one another off, and generally spending more time trying to say their piece than listening to anyone else’s viewpoint. Nevertheless, I’ll try to make my notes and reflections as coherent as possible while still accurately reflecting everything that was said.
To begin with, the statements of the boys: the hijab and the restrictions on women are designed to protect them. If women are not visible to men, audible to men, or perceptible to men, then they won’t tempt men, and therefore they won’t be harassed by men. The boys used the example that if a women walked naked down the street, all the men who saw her would desire her, wouldn’t be able to control their instincts, and would attack her.
The girls’ response: Why is it the responsibility of the women to keep the men from acting like beasts? Why can’t the men be strong enough not to think about sex all the time? The brain should rule the body, not the other way around. And who said anything about being naked? We walk down the street fully clothed, and we get hit on and catcalled at least ten times a day. We’re certainly not dressing provocatively or acting in any manner that might remotely be considered erotic.
To which the boys reiterated that weak men can’t control themselves, weak people can’t control themselves, and if one of the guys were to get naked right now wouldn’t Autumn and I be tempted?
No, was our immediate, unison response. No, not in the slightest. I think his male ego was a bit deflated after that.
But with regards to the idea that weak people can’t be tempted…how on earth are these supposed weak people going to be able to make themselves stronger if they aren’t occasionally challenged? Not by naked people walking down the street, which really happens quite rarely in most of the world, but by more everyday things? If people are never challenged, they will never improve themselves, was Autumn’s main statement, and I agree. But I would add that no one can be improved or redeemed by subjugating anyone else. And while men here might convince themselves that restrictions on women are there for the women’s own protection, the evidence indicates the contrary. A good Moroccan friend of mine wears full hijab and tells me that she still gets catcalled on the streets. And women in full face veils may be anonymous, but they are conspicuous by their very anonymity. They may get less overt male attention because they generally don’t leave the house without a male relative, but they do get noticed all the same. And I highly doubt that anyone enjoys or feels protected by wearing head to toe black clothing in the middle of August heat.
I have more to say on this topic, but it’s 1am now and I have work tomorrow, so I’ll have to finish these thoughts in another entry at another time.
9 August 2008
Or rather, we talked about a lot of semirelated things including women in Islam and in Morocco, Islam in general, Arab countries versus the US, capitalism, and so forth. And I’m honestly not sure how much communication actually took place.
It all started when my friend Autumn asked why women aren’t supposed to pray out loud in mosques like men. The answer that the boys gave was so that weak men wouldn’t hear women’s voices and be aroused by them. Frankly I found this explanation to be bullshit, as very few women have voices that are that inherently sexy. The same explanation was offered for why women have to keep covered and wear hijab (headscarfs). So that weak men won’t see them and be tempted. And the boys seemed to see no problem with this logic. But when Autumn asked why it was the women’s responsibility to protect men from their baser instincts, the merde hit the fan and resulted in a conversation that lasted until four o’clock in the morning.
The conversation was not in the least bit organized, with people getting defensive, jumping to conclusions, changing the topic, cutting one another off, and generally spending more time trying to say their piece than listening to anyone else’s viewpoint. Nevertheless, I’ll try to make my notes and reflections as coherent as possible while still accurately reflecting everything that was said.
To begin with, the statements of the boys: the hijab and the restrictions on women are designed to protect them. If women are not visible to men, audible to men, or perceptible to men, then they won’t tempt men, and therefore they won’t be harassed by men. The boys used the example that if a women walked naked down the street, all the men who saw her would desire her, wouldn’t be able to control their instincts, and would attack her.
The girls’ response: Why is it the responsibility of the women to keep the men from acting like beasts? Why can’t the men be strong enough not to think about sex all the time? The brain should rule the body, not the other way around. And who said anything about being naked? We walk down the street fully clothed, and we get hit on and catcalled at least ten times a day. We’re certainly not dressing provocatively or acting in any manner that might remotely be considered erotic.
To which the boys reiterated that weak men can’t control themselves, weak people can’t control themselves, and if one of the guys were to get naked right now wouldn’t Autumn and I be tempted?
No, was our immediate, unison response. No, not in the slightest. I think his male ego was a bit deflated after that.
But with regards to the idea that weak people can’t be tempted…how on earth are these supposed weak people going to be able to make themselves stronger if they aren’t occasionally challenged? Not by naked people walking down the street, which really happens quite rarely in most of the world, but by more everyday things? If people are never challenged, they will never improve themselves, was Autumn’s main statement, and I agree. But I would add that no one can be improved or redeemed by subjugating anyone else. And while men here might convince themselves that restrictions on women are there for the women’s own protection, the evidence indicates the contrary. A good Moroccan friend of mine wears full hijab and tells me that she still gets catcalled on the streets. And women in full face veils may be anonymous, but they are conspicuous by their very anonymity. They may get less overt male attention because they generally don’t leave the house without a male relative, but they do get noticed all the same. And I highly doubt that anyone enjoys or feels protected by wearing head to toe black clothing in the middle of August heat.
I have more to say on this topic, but it’s 1am now and I have work tomorrow, so I’ll have to finish these thoughts in another entry at another time.
9 August 2008
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